Consider one of the most perplexing questions of our time: ention, why does so much unnecessary stuff get invented?
If a word in a dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
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If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?Why do you need a driver's licence to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? Where do' solutions go when a candidate gets elected? 
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For Laughing Out Loud : Poems toTickle Your Funnybone
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For those who believe in laughter, a collection of 132 rib-tickling verses to suit almost every taste and age from a varied gathering of luminaries.
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Why, if the best things in life are free, the next-best things are so expensive?

 
 " Because your mother is cold. That's why."
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Stand-Up Comedy : The Book
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Seinfeld is more than just a TV show, and Wild's tribute is more than just an episode guide. As he states in his introduction, "...for me, Seinfeld is one of those rare redeemers of popular culture; like Sinatra, pasta, or the Beatles, Seinfeld shows that sometimes the masses get things exactly right." 
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What will fall on the lawn first? An autumn leaf or a Christmas catalogue?  Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks? 
Do steam rollers really roll steam? Do vampires get AIDS?
Why do you need a driver's licence to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? 
Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"? Does killing time damage eternity?
Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called ship-ment but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?  How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night? 
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers? What Mrs. Dumpty gave Humpty?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?  Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? 
How come wrong numbers are never busy? How long will a floating point operation float?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes - why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?  You know how most packages say "Open here".  What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"? 

If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?
How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
If CON is the opposite of PRO, is congress the opposite of progress?  If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight? 
How many weeks are there in a light year? If love is blind, why is Lingerie so popular?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?  How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work? 
If you didn't get caught, did you really do it? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Why are there interstates in Hawaii?  Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mine? 
Is it ok to use my AM radio after NOON? What color is a chameleon on a mirror?
If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what would happen if you tied a pice of buttered toast on the back of a cat and dropped it?  If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors? 
Do fish get thirsty? Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? 
If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?  If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn on your head-lights, what happens? 
Why is brassiere singular and panties plural?  If all the nations in the world are in the debt, where did all the money go?
Why do we drive on parkways when we park on driveways?  Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? 
How does AVON find so many women willing to take orders ? If the world is getting smaller, why do postal rates keep going up?
 Consider one of the most perplexing questions of our time: Where do' solutions go when a candidate gets elected?  Don't you just hate the blatant materialism surrounding Christmas? 
And aren't you just dying to know what you got?
If a word in a dictionary were misspelled, how would we know? If necessity is the mother of invention, why does so much unnecessary stuff get invented? 
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn the radio down?  If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from? 
Which of the Himalayas is the shortest? If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?
If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? Why does an inspiring sight like a sunrise always have to take place at such an inconvenient time? 
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Comedy Central : The Essential Guide to Comedy : Because There's a Fine Line Between Clever and Stupid
by Christopher 1962 Claro, Julie Klam, Comedy Central 
From standups to sitcoms, The Simpsons to Saturday Night Live, this is the book that no one who likes to laugh should be without. Designed for lively reading with photos, sidebars, excerpts, and lists, it runs the gamut from an overview of the late-night talk show scene to interviews with hot young standup comics. Comedy Central: The Essential Guide to Comedy is a backstage pass to the business and a behind-the-scenes tour with the talents who make it happen.
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